Ungrateful

I’m sitting here horrified. I’ve always been thankful for my “stuff”: my transportation, the roof over my head, the food on my table. How then, could I be ungrateful? Isn’t there a verse that says, “Pride cometh before a fall.”? Well, even though I may have fallen privately, I still got a good knock on the head as a wake up call.  Tonight I found out the hard-honest truth, I have been living a life of ungratefulness.

(IMPORTANT SIDE-NOTE: If you ever feel this pull to talk to God, stop whatever you are doing and start praying. Most likely, its somewhat of an emergency in God’s eyes and He needs to deal with you right away. If you are obedient, I guarantee that you will be blessed. Tonight was no exception.)

For six years, I’ve been a teacher. I’ve done a good job, but I never loved it by any means. At the beginning it was just to pay bills. Later, God talked to me about going in there and doing it unto Him so I was obedient in that, and the job got better. But again, teaching wasn’t my passion and I always wondered when He would free me from it so that I could serve my real purpose. Now, I feel so ashamed.

God loved me so much that He gave me everything in my job. He opened up so many doors and allowed me to experience so many things and I took everything for granted. For six years, God allowed me to do everything I love: read, work with kids, dabble in graphic design, write plays, design a yearbook, and so on. And the whole time, I was looking for the escape route.

In less than 2 months I will no longer be teaching at my school. Over the past few weeks I’ve been pushing for a new career, all the while feeling that God is still calling me to teach. Now, I realize; maybe it’s not that I didn’t like teaching, maybe it’s that I never saw it for it was. Maybe I spent so much time taking it for granted, that I missed 6 great years of God giving me everything I could ask for in a job and more.

I don’t want to miss out on the love of Christ because I am being ungrateful, and don’t even recognize His love when I see it. How horrible would that be? How horrible would that be for any relationship?

Sometimes we need to get over ourselves and get with God. We say we will do His will, but do we really mean it or are we more like Jonah, running away from God’s will and even when we finally succumb to it, we are miserable the entire time? I refuse to live like that!

I love what Paul says in 1 Timothy 1:12, “I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me trustworthy, appointing me to his service.”

God considers you and I trustworthy to do His work. That says a lot about how He feels for his children. Let’s praise Him and thank Him for every opportunity He gives us, even if it’s not necessarily what we would have chosen. Father knows best.

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